Is this a good thing? I mean, if everyone gets to make every decision, it'd prevent an individual from not getting what he wants, needs, desires... It would be nice to just throw things out there and say that everyone should do what they want, make all the decisions... But this is contrary to human nature. Without leadership, and their followings, chaos would ensue. Nothing would get done. There isn't such a thing as a perfect democracy. The U.S. itself is a Republic-Democracy. We elect leaders to make the decisions for us. We have to trust that they will make the best choices for our country...
And therein lies the issue. Who makes for a good leader? This applies not only to nations, but to people, to relationships as well. First off, what makes for a good leader? Someone who is willing to place another's needs above his own. Looking at Matthew 20: 25-28, Jesus tells his disciples how a person should lead:
"Jesus called them together and said, 'You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.'"
...The leadership lies upon my shoulders in this relationship. What I'm trying to share with you is how I'm trying to handle myself as a leader. I make the decisions, but with this privilege comes with responsibilities. I must serve those under me. At this time, I must serve my girlfriend and be attentive to her needs.
What else entails leadership? One of the things I have learned at a camp I attended through high school was how to be a leader. They showed me the essential "5 Pillars of Leadership". This is the basic stuff that every good leader should know and practice.
1. Meekness
What is meekness? Meekness is controlled power. We see this in people if they are patient and humble. Some view this as weakness. But it is not weakness. Being gentle allows for one to have much more power than some hothead running his mouth all the time. It's the power of persuasion. If you are meek, you will receive respect, and when you ask something of someone instead of telling them what to do, you will get a better response. "Ask and you shall receive." Meekness is a key component of being a leader.
2. Integrity
Integrity is the quality of being whole or undivided. As a leader, you must not be compromised. If you are, then your ability to lead will be hindered by your followers' views of you. Being unpredictable is dangereous, no one wants to risk having a leader who might back down from what they had promised before. It is frustrating, and it is a fast way to lose all of your following. Integrity is vital to any leader.
3. Vision
Vision is seeing God's presence, power, and plan, despite obstacles. As a leader, you can't go very far if you don't look to the One Above for the road ahead. You need to seek God and let Him reveal the stuff before you. You will be blind without His guidance, and bringing another person into a pit with you is the easiest and fastest way to have them resent you and disregard your skills as a leader. They'll find a way to dig themselves out of the pit, and won't trust you to lead them anymore.
4. Attitude
Attitude is infectious all the time. You can't go anywhere and not be affected by the "vibes" around you. Having a good attitude is important. Your followers will take up the same attitude as yourself. If you're indifferent towards him or her, they'll be the same towards you. If you are controlling and manipulative, it will become a game and they will do the same. Yes, your followers are their own person, but their general attitude will act like a mirror to view yourself and your attitude.
5. Empowerment
Leadership is a gift. Learn to give it away. You have to be loose with your reins of power. This isn't an excuse to lose responsibility, rather you must be appropriate in giving away the responsibilities in your possession. You grabbed the power in the first place, so you had better keep a hold onto it til it is the right time to let go. Be responsible. But also allow others to take on that responsibility for themselves when they're ready. Having immature followers is a recipe for getting nowhere fast. They'll only drag you down, until you let them grow some.
...Difficult sounding? Yes. But these are necessary. One last thing to remember about leadership, and this is far from being least important:
"Leadership is manifested, not bestowed."
You can't sit around and expect leadership to fall into your lap. You have to be responsible and work at earning the ability to lead.
That's all I have for you today. God Bless!
-Noah
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